The Charts: A Paradise for Burnout?

When you have no other games being released and the only racer many are expecting even though the game clearly is utter s**t but many dont get the chance to try out a demo then what else is there to buy?

What about the many that will be taking their copies back to the shops like I will come this Friday?

Need For Burnout: CRAP EDITION

You really are an utter t**t, you know that? You've spent every waking hour since the demo hit complaining about how "it's not Burnout" and now you say you've actually bought the game, just so you can have the satisfaction of taking it back?


I don't care how jaded you are, you're just plain wrong on that point. The SPOnG office is currently consumed by Burnout Paradise and we range from newbies to the games scene to miserable old hands from the pre-console era. Everybody who has played it has loved it.

Obviously, you are entitled to your opinion, but when you appear to make your opinions up just to incite invective, you're just a trolling pillock.

Firstly if you ALL at Spong love the game then you all have been bribed by EA, there is no way in hell this game is that good nor is it like how Burnout should be.

Are you to tell me that ALL the people that have been complaining soo much so that even the developer of the game has complained back at those who dislike the game are wrong?

The game is broken in the sense the thing that made Burnout what it was has been taken away.

And its the same take on NFS series what made NFS so great has gone clearly from the latest Pro Street series.

You only have this website so you can get freebies at your offices and go to game conventions, you dont give a rats ass on most of your reviews, if someone pushes you an envelope you will take it and thats a fact with many reviewers.

You want to call me a trolling pillock? Well good for you because I know I could review a game better than you ever could - a review doesnt have to be a huge page or 2 pages, it needs to be simple and get straight to what makes a game great or bad including functions and options.

I am VERY particular on my games and too many people in this gen are too easily pleased by the amount of crap many developers are releasing, take Conan for example or Juiced 2 or better yet PGR3 and 4.

Oh but I bet you are suprised that I would even mentioned PGR3 and 4 but surely being someone who reviews games would easily know why I picked them.

Nothing I like more than being defamed in public. So, EA has bribed us then? No, it hasn't but I will be more than happy to pass your contention its legal department as soon as mine has cleared it.



Nope - that's not what has been said. I believe the phrase 'entitled to your opinion' cropped up earlier.



And that 'thing' is? Or do you mean that it has evolved... changed?



Brilliant! You have been a clever boy. Your information comes from?



Nope, that's a strategy or game guide - having also worked for Prima, I know the difference. Why don't you write a review then? Send it in and see how your opinion stacks up?



Those are your reviews?



Because as a Microsoft fanboy, you've decided that because Bizarre might be doing multi-platformers, you feel peeved?

Go on, write something constructive.

Tim

Damn you Tim, I was just working up a head of steam...

No I am not a Microsoft fanboy, its not my fault Microsoft have a product on the market the delivers at all angles when it comes to gaming and content. However I have a Nintendo Wii and praise that more than the PS3 when it comes to yes again GAMING.

I am actually happy that BC have pissed off since they f**ked up PGR3 and then more so with PGR4 thank the heavens they wont be making PGR4! Hell even the so-called game The Club is a mindless piece of s**t.

You cant just go around saying every game is amazing when it clearly isnt, I cant think of any racing games that DONT have a speedometer in a game apart from this one! Where is the aftertouch? What happened to those amazing crashes? What happened to actually earning your boost?

Without reading Tim's response, heres my take:

Look you bloody little git, if you think writing a game review is so bloody easy, you do it, and submit it to Tim. I know he'll publish it, if its any good at all he'll be grateful for the content, if its not, I'm sure we'd all enjoy a chuckle at your expense. I KNOW I can write better than you, am smarter than you, and obviously my opinions mean more to me than yours do, and yet, even I hesitate to enter the ring. Partly from lack of inspiration, partly pure lazyness, partly my failure to view games critically (I did submit an abortive draft of a Simpsons Game review, but never heard anything back, I'm sure it was lousy). And since I voluntarily sit on the sidelines, I limit my criticisms to what I feel is constructive, rather than merely slagging off the skills and inegrity of the people who actually do have the courage to submit intellectual product for my consumption. Unless I feel such slagging off to be contsructive...anyway, I'm a coward in that fashion, at least to date...might do a "New" piece on Vegas 2 when I can get my grubby little paws onnit.

In short, I don't think you could write your way out of a paper bag, and I dare you to prove me wrong.

p.s. I NEVER liked either Burnout or PGR (did play PGR 2 online for a bit, but its weak compared to Forza), they're both garbage to me.
Also, as someone who had followed the NFS seeries from II, I'm curious what exactly is it that YOU think makes (made?) the NFS series great?

p.p.s. One of the reasons why this is the only videogames site I'm active on IS that I trust the integrity of SPOnG, implicitly. If you have such distrust...why not find somewhere else, somewhere you feel you can trust?

Anyhow yep also started off at NFS 2 on the PC, loved the commentries and vids etc and the gameplay was spot on back then.

'Your words are obsolete'

Check.



Check.



Oh, now I feel rotten... send in Vegas 2 piece.



I refer the honourable gentleman to my previous response.



Thanks for that, Roi. I will - again - extend the offer to all readers.

"If you have a well-constructed alternative review, send the bloody thing in to me. tim@spong.com

Cheers

Tim

Now - got to go, lawyers waiting...

We were bribed by EA?! Tim, you bastard, where's my cash!?



What a review does have to be is a well-justified response to a game, giving opinion supported by arguments...



Ah... Would it be wrong of me to point out that your opinion seems to be formed based on... what? The demo? A preview? You've written an entire game off as s**t without having played it? Really? I would love to read a review from you some day.

I see a career for you in on-line writing, you could call your column "Zero Consideration" and it would consist of the title of the game and a five word max review.

Burnout Paradise: CRAP EDITION
PGR3: F**ked up
The Club: A mindless piece of s**t
Halo 3: Bestest game evar!!!11!!One!

See? It just writes its self.

I downloaded The Club demo, I saw what I had to do on the intro and my jaw dropped in absolute disgust.

Its not a game but an absolute mindless 'manhunt' type of game.

So you just go around shooting people to keep your multiplier up, what the f**k?

If anyone calls this game The Club a game they are clearly stupid. Its not a game but pure garbage.

BC couldnt make a decent game to save their life oh wait nope looks like someone had to do it for them...Because it wasnt gonna be Microsoft, who wants a developer that cant make a decent racer even after 2 attempts?

A game is something that is enjoyable and 'fun' there is no 'fun' in just shooting people to keep my score up nor is it fun to go around killing people in different mad ways aka manhunt which i am glad is banned from the UK.

When a developer is being lazy or sloppy as are EA where I could give many examples what really makes their game worth purchasing? Brand? Hype? License?

Many developers seem to be forgetting what 'fun and 'enjoyable' is, Nintendo have got it perfect with the Wii hell Capcom dont churn out s**t load of games but I could sit down and right you a review on Resident Evil 4 and be happy writing it because that game is fantastic.

Hand me junk like The Club and first impressions are 'why the f**k did you hand me this?'

Everyones tastes are different but to keep reviewing games and praising them all and not praising the ones that deserve it like Mass Effect although it does have its issues so I dont expect it to get a 10/10 or anything.

Evidently EA must have been quite liberal with their cash based on the overall Metacritic score ;)
http://www.metacritic.com/search/process?sort=relevance&termType=all&ts=burnout+paradise&ty=3&x=0&y=0
With a score like that either:
A. The game is actually good
or
B. EA bought the internet


Got to be said, I'm quite interested in Burnout Paradise, looks like it is going to be fun - just can't justify getting it until I have more time available - just got a 360 at Christmas and have plenty of games to get through first.

Right... good, we're getting somewhere.

Off you jolly well go.

tim@spong.com

'Fun'! That's the word for it! Burnout is fun.

Cheers

Tim